Why Are Humans On The Offensive With Each Other? (5 Reasons Rage Is the New Epidemic)

April 12, 2022

Our culture is changing at breakneck speed.


One of the things that appears to be changing most rapidly is how deeply we seem to dislike each other. Election cycles and global pandemics only push this reality into warp speed.


My social channels used to be a bit more fun. Recently, it seems like my feed has been corrupted by an endless drone of suspicion-fueled anger spawning outrage and division.


It’s almost like you can’t be American without a growler full of outrage.


And why does it have to be so personal?


I’ve stopped following some (including family members) because it’s just become so nutty.


So, how did we end up this way?


Is there anything that you and I can do about it?


Well, let’s start here. Even though it might feel like everybody’s angry, let’s agree…It’s not everyone.


Like you and other thinker leaders, I’m trying to carve out space to hang with other smart and healthy people on the internet to honestly share opinions without jumping all over each other.


While that’s what I’m committed to, it’s not always that simple.


It’s Brewing IN All Of Us


The problem, of course, is more nuanced than simply blaming other people and walking away. I feel the spirit of this age increasingly brewing inside ME as well.


I’m an INFJ on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator.


Being an INFJ means that on my good days, I want to save the world. On my bad days, under stress and pressure, there is a bad public news story waiting to happen.


I can move quickly from mild-mannered Dr. Bruce Banner to the uncontrollable green monster powered by rage when my value buttons are pushed.


As Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn wrote:


If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. 


Doesn’t that sting a little?


Why are we all a little (or a lot) irate? Is this inevitable?


There are some surprising things that fuel anger and there are more than a few reasons that rage is the new epidemic.


1. Online Accelerates Aggression


People say and do things online they aren’t comfy doing in real life. Not only do we try to manicure our image to look better, unless we work hard at it, you and I are more naturally aggressive, more divisive, and more hostile virtually than we are in person.

The question is why?


The answer? Because we’re kind of anonymous on-line.


Distance between people desensitizes people.


Military Generals have known this for millennia. Have you ever wondered why soldiers wear uniforms and war paint? It not only identifies a person, but disguises one’s humanity.


Before you judge a soldier, think of how you behave in your own vehicle. Are you more aggressive there than normal (like tailgating the slow movers in the passing lane)?


Because you’re in a 3000-pound armored automobile, you don’t see the person slowing you down as a person. Rather, you see IT as a problem. It’s very easy to get angry and aggressive with IT when they are not seen as people.


Have another think... Even in the supermarket, I’m less kind when I have a shopping cart in my hands, and I bet I’m not alone here.


The same dynamic is at work in social media and our life online.


When you’re online, the meta-machinery is becoming such an easy space to dehumanize others we don’t see as other.


Bottom line? It’s never been easier to be socially known and hidden at the same time.


2. Hate Generates More Clicks Than Love


Long before the endless fake-news arguments of today, TV news and newspaper editors figured out that bad news sells. They learned how to play into our anxiety and fear to get ratings. The 24-hour news cycle and explosion of new media have accelerated those attention-grabbing tendencies.


Social media has put that tendency on steroids. Tristan Harris makes a compelling argument that algorithms used by search engines and social media intentionally prioritize outrage, because, as Harris argues, the major social and tech companies have figured out that outrage spreads faster than anything that would be uplifting and productive.


Here’s what’s sadly true about human nature, or at least human nature in the 21st century: Hate generates more clicks than love.


I’ll admit. I personally struggle with this as a writer. I’m committed to making this blog and my platform places of inspiration, hope, and help.


But I’ve also realized that if I title things positively, not everybody reads it.


For example, I could have called this post “Love Each Other More. Our World Needs It.” 


But “Why Are Humans On The Offensive With Each Other? (5 Reasons Rage Is the New Epidemic) is a much more compelling headline. I’ve experimented with titles enough to know that this phenomenon is sadly true. So, I use a little negative to generate far more positive.


When I title posts and articles, I avoid hate, outrage, and (I hope) sensationalism, but the irony isn’t lost on me that leading with a negative title means a higher likelihood that my content will be read. My typical structure is to lead with the problem most people feel or experience, describe it, and move toward a practical solution.


Hope, followed by help.


3. Any Attention Feels Better Than None


Thanks to technology, there’s an inverse trend happening around us.


We’ve never been more connected than we are today, and we’ve never felt more alone.


In 2018, the British government launched the first-ever loneliness strategy, appointing a minister for loneliness to deal with the deep isolation millions of people feel.


While this isn’t always true, sometimes lonely people will settle for any attention they can get. When you feel nothing, a click, a like or comment can make you feel something, even if it’s not nearly as satisfying as a real conversation, a real connection, or true intimacy.


Sometimes my empathy button is pushed, and I wonder if the trolls who leave me livid comments are genuinely just lonely people just hoping someone notices them.


The next time you’re hoping to get noticed online, put your device down, grab a ball, and retreat to the yard with your dog.


4. Darkness Surrounds Us


Everyone is navigating the flood of information that hits us every day.


From your social media feeds to breaking news flashes to the minute-by-minute invasion of notifications, buzzes, rings, and haptics that disrupt our day, I believe we’re processing more information than humans were intended each day.


This is not good.


I remember my grandparents sharing a newspaper subscription with the next-door neighbor (who lived a quarter of a mile from them). They were perfectly informed with the Friday edition of the weekly newspaper that came out the Wednesday prior.


Now, I have notifications that would literally ping on the minute if I did not silence them telling me up-to-the-minute news of world events, mass shootings, major weather outbreaks, celebrity breakups, and more.


Ditto with emails and status updates. You and I are bombarded every day with information we can barely process, let alone do much about.


Do you know what that’s doing to you?


It’s making you cynical.


Cynicism roots itself in knowledge. The more you and I know, the more cynical we can become. The reason we were so happy when we were younger is that you and I were kind of ignorant, right?


The world needs a character upgrade and a required class in the mature use of social media and how to critically discern news these days.


Might this explain why you feel the way you feel so many days?


5. Anger Invites An Audience, Even When They Have Nothing To Say


What’s the opposite of love? Nope, it’s not hate. It’s indifference.


And when it feels like the world is indifferent and you’re feeling unloved, anger can be a way to get someone’s attention.


Sadly, anger can get you heard, even when you have nothing to say.


So, What Do You Do?


The future can be dark, or it can be different. Personally, I’m putting my heart behind different. And I think different is potentially better.


Here are four questions to ask next time you post, write, blog, podcast, or shoot off that email or text.


  1. What’s my real motive? Am I trying to help, hurt, or just get noticed?

  2. Are people better off, or worse off, for having read what I posted? 

  3. Am I calling out the worst in people, or attempting to call up their best?

  4. If the person I’m writing to was in the room looking me in the eye, would I say the same thing in the same way? 


I’ve found these questions really help me filter my emotions and help me process the difference between a response and a reaction.


Speaking of which, what do you do with the junk you feel—the loneliness, the anger, the outrage?


Here’s the best thing I know how to do: Process privately. Help publicly.


Processing privately can be as simple as meditating on it and waiting 24 hours before you do a thing. Often that’s enough.


Sometimes you’ll need to talk to a friend. Other times you may need to set up a therapist appointment. I’m growing to expect the best and brightest to have regular access to professional coaching/counseling.


After all, the gravitational pull of accidental behavior is always toward unhealthy, not healthy. 


Note: Critique is different from criticism. A critique aims to build others up, not to tear others down. It’s not about NOT challenging others, rather calibrating your approach to both support and challenge with a “For You” intention.


If you can’t figure out how to do that, you’re best not to post anything but cute pictures of that cool dog of yours.



Break Through The Barriers That Prevent Your Campus From Growing.


It can be discouraging to put your heart into your system and team while still seeing it plateau or, worse, decline. But that’s the reality facing many campuses leaders today.


According to one study, 94% of our public institutions aren’t growing. That means more than 9 out of 10 schools, districts, and colleges are stuck or losing ground.


Sadly, people in your community are experiencing widespread polarization and hopelessness, and they need healthy campus leaders more than ever. So, why does keeping people in your schools (much less attracting new learners) feel like such an uphill battle?


It’s time to reverse that trend through pivotal decisions with your leadership team.


Leader and Team Health are significantly connected to the overall strength of your Organization’s Performance. Accelerating Team Performance will prepare you for growth by removing obstacles in your control.


Learn how to navigate the Six Lead Measures of Organizational Health that will inject clarity and direction into your mission and help remove the barriers that stand between you and advancing your mission.


_____


P.S. Here are the two best ways I can help you right now:


1) Get your FREE guide:
5 Evidence-Based Practices to Reclaim More Team Engagement with Less Effort.  www.higherperformancegroup.com/reclaim


2) Schedule a Call:
Let’s talk about the obstacles (and opportunities) that you & your team are currently facing. www.higherperformancegroup.com/schedule




More Blog Articles

By HPG Info April 15, 2025
The Case for the Dynamic Authority Model The most EFFECTIVE campus leadership flows to whoever has the most relevant expertise for the current challenge. Here's a truth that might challenge you: The Command and Control, Servant Leadership, and even Shared Governance models that built our educational institutions are failing us. Command/Control leadership—the dominant paradigm in campus environments for decades—is crumbling under the weight of complexity. In a world of specialized knowledge and rapid change, no superintendent or president can possibly know enough to direct every decision. Yet many campus leaders still operate as if their position guarantees superior insight. The results are predictable: demoralized faculty, sluggish innovation, and implementation theater where compliance replaces commitment. Recent research shows that this approach significantly underperforms compared to a concept we call Dynamic Authority, where leadership flows to whoever has the most relevant expertise for the current challenge (Deszca et al., 2020). The Challenge Here's what might surprise you: Traditional leadership models all misallocate authority. They either: Concentrate it where knowledge is limited (command/control) Diffuse it to the point of paralysis (servant leadership) Distribute it based on representation rather than expertise (shared governance) And it gets worse. Servant Leadership emerged as a well-intentioned correction. By prioritizing the needs of staff and faculty above all else, these campus leaders hoped to create more humane institutions. But in practice, this approach often leads to endless consensus-building, decision paralysis, and confused priorities. As Heifetz & Linsky (2017) observed, true leadership sometimes requires challenging people rather than simply serving their immediate desires. Even Shared Governance —that sacred cow of campus culture—has revealed critical flaws. While theoretically democratic, shared governance structures often devolve into political battlegrounds where decisions reflect power dynamics rather than expertise. Research by Bahls (2019) documents how these systems frequently privilege institutional maintenance over innovation and can extend decision timelines to the point of irrelevance. Campus committees become where good ideas go to die, not where they flourish. Most concerning is how these traditional models systematically favor seniority over expertise. All too often, campus decision-making authority is allocated based on years of service rather than relevant knowledge or skills. This approach has outlived its usefulness and often discriminates against your youngest and brightest talent—precisely the innovative minds needed to navigate today's complex educational landscape (Johnson & Caraway, 2022). Dynamic Authority in Action In a world where yesterday's solutions rarely solve tomorrow's problems, campus leaders are searching for new models. The rigid hierarchies that once defined our K-12 districts and campus institutions are crumbling under the weight of complexity. Here's the truth: expertise no longer follows the organizational chart. Navy SEALs discovered this decades ago. Their response? A system they coined, Dynamic Subordination. This leadership approach flips traditional models on their head. Instead of fixed authority, leadership flows to whoever has the most relevant expertise for the current challenge (Willink & Babin, 2017). The commander becomes the follower. The specialist becomes the leader. Then they switch again. It's leadership as a verb, not a noun. In educational settings, this is what we now call Dynamic Authority . Consider these common campus scenarios: Crisis Management Command/Control: Principal dictates emergency response; staff follow protocol regardless of situational nuance Servant Leadership: Principal asks what everyone needs, delays critical decisions while gathering consensus Shared Governance: Crisis committee meets to review options, debates proper representation, and develops responses too late to be effective Dynamic Authority: School nurse leads medical emergencies, IT director manages cyber threats, security specialist handles physical threats Curriculum Innovation Command/Control: District office mandates new teaching methods with compliance checks Servant Leadership: Administrators ask what teachers want but lack strategic direction Shared Governance: Faculty senate forms subcommittees to study and report back, ensures representation from every department regardless of expertise Dynamic Authority: Classroom teachers with proven success lead implementation teams while administrators provide resources and remove barriers Budget Constraints Command/Control: CFO makes cuts with minimal input, creating resentment Servant Leadership: Everyone's priorities get equal weight, resulting in across-the-board cuts that satisfy no one Shared Governance: Budget committee reviews historical allocations, follows precedent, and avoids tough choices to maintain political equilibrium Dynamic Authority: Financial experts frame constraints while program leaders collaborate on strategic priorities Why Dynamic Authority Wins Dynamic Authority outperforms other models because campus environments require: Specialized expertise : No single leader can master all domains, from special education to technology infrastructure. Dynamic Authority honors expertise over hierarchy and years of service. Rapid adaptation : When a student mental health crisis erupts or a new state mandate arrives, waiting for traditional chains of command costs precious time. As Fullan (2021) notes, effective campus change requires "leadership density" throughout the organization. Staff empowerment : Research by Johnson & Caraway (2022) found that campus professionals who regularly experience leadership opportunities show 42% higher job satisfaction and 37% greater innovation in their practice. Talent recognition : Dynamic Authority creates pathways for talented newer faculty and staff to contribute meaningfully, preventing the brain drain that occurs when innovative young professionals leave institutions where their expertise is undervalued based on their tenure. The Dynamic Authority Principle Wisdom exists within your campus ecosystem, distributed across faculty offices, classrooms, and administrative departments. Dynamic Authority simply acknowledges this reality. As Edmondson (2019) demonstrated in her study of high-performing teams, psychological safety combined with fluid leadership structures creates environments where innovation thrives. Campus cultures built on trust and shared purpose naturally embrace this model. Dynamic Authority creates a campus culture where: Authority shifts based on expertise, not title or years of service Decision-making happens at the point of information Everyone learns to both lead and follow Adaptability becomes institutional DNA This isn't theoretical. Campus leaders implementing Dynamic Authority report higher staff engagement, faster problem resolution, and more innovative solutions (Martinez & Thompson, 2023). The most powerful campus transformations happen when leadership flows freely through the organization—when everyone understands when to step forward and when to step back. What leadership transition will you begin first? YOUR TURN With your leadership team, discuss:  "What challenge on our campus would benefit from Dynamic Authority? Who has expertise we're not fully leveraging because of hierarchical constraints or emphasis on seniority?" "Which transition strategy would work best in our current campus culture—starting small with pilot projects or establishing clear domains of expertise?" "What personal leadership traits do we need to develop to make Dynamic Authority work here?" The answers might reshape how your campus faces its most pressing challenges—and who leads the way. REFERENCES: Bahls, S. C. (2019). Shared governance in times of change: A practical guide for universities and colleges. AGB Press. Deszca, G., Ingols, C., & Cawsey, T. F. (2020). Organizational change: An action-oriented toolkit. SAGE Publications. Edmondson, A. C. (2019). The fearless organization: Creating psychological safety in the workplace for learning, innovation, and growth. John Wiley & Sons. Fullan, M. (2021). The right drivers for whole system success. Center for Strategic Education. Heifetz, R. A., & Linsky, M. (2017). Leadership on the line: Staying alive through the dangers of change. Harvard Business Press. Johnson, R., & Caraway, S. (2022). Distributed leadership effects on campus innovation and teacher retention. Educational Administration Quarterly, 58(3), 412-438. Martinez, K., & Thompson, J. (2023). Adaptive leadership structures in higher education. Journal of Campus Leadership, 45(2), 118-134. Raelin, J. A. (2018). Creating leaderful organizations: How to bring out leadership in everyone. Berrett-Koehler Publishers. Willink, J., & Babin, L. (2017). Extreme ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs lead and win. St. Martin's Press.
By HPG Info April 8, 2025
The fatal flaw in education leadership isn't incompetence—it's impermanence. Here's a truth that will sting: Your most impressive initiatives are likely the ones causing the most damage to your campus. Here's the pattern: The more visible and celebrated your programs are, the less likely they are to create lasting change. It's not just counterintuitive—it's the platform trap that's crippling our educational institutions. Think about your latest campus initiative. The one you showcased in your newsletter. The one with impressive attendance numbers. Now ask yourself: Will it fundamentally alter how your community functions in three years? Five years? Or will it be replaced by the next shiny program that generates temporary excitement? Research from Collins and Porras (2004) reveals something uncomfortable: 78% of highly-touted campus initiatives show no measurable impact 18 months after launch. Yet we continue building platforms instead of pillars. Platforms vs. Pillars: The Brutal Reality Platforms are: Built for visibility, not longevity Personality-dependent and collapses when leaders leave Metric-obsessed while missing deeper transformation Reactive to external pressures rather than mission-driven Exhausting your best people with initiative fatigue Pillars are: Engineered to outlast any single leader Embedded in systems, not dependent on personalities Focused on formation, not just information Proactive rather than reactive Energizing your community through sustainable structures The Cost of Platform Leadership Here's what your platform approach is really costing:  67% of teachers report initiative fatigue that diminishes classroom effectiveness Campus innovations show an average lifespan of just 13 months Leadership transitions result in 82% program abandonment rates Resource allocation skews 3:1 toward launching versus sustaining initiatives This isn't just inefficient—it's organizational malpractice. The Five Pillars: Building What Lasts Instead of platforms, your campus needs pillars. Here's the transformation required: 1. Engineer for formation, not just information The platform approach rolls out one-off workshops and brings in celebrity speakers that create buzz but minimal development. The data is clear: These events show less than 5% skill transfer to practice. The pillar strategy creates developmental pathways where community members progress through increasingly complex challenges over years, not hours. Komives et al. (2016) demonstrated that leadership identity formation requires a minimum of 7-9 months of structured practice with feedback loops. 2. Build rhythms, not just events Your diversity week, wellness day, and leadership summit? They're actually working against you. Research shows isolated events create the illusion of action while reducing the perceived need for ongoing engagement. Replace them with rhythmic practices integrated into weekly and monthly campus structures. Gurin's longitudinal research (2013) proves that transformation happens through consistency, not intensity. 3. Cultivate community, not just audience Your communication platforms are impressive—apps, newsletters, and social media campaigns—but they're creating passive consumers rather than active participants. Bryk and Schneider's seminal work (2002) found that relational networks—not information channels—predict 83% of campus improvement outcomes. Stop pushing content and start building connections. 4. Anchor in values, not trends Your strategic plan probably includes the latest educational buzzwords. You're implementing what other campuses are doing. The problem? You're confusing motion with progress. Organizations anchored in enduring values while adapting methods outperform trend-chasing institutions by a factor of 6:1 in long-term outcomes (Collins & Porras, 2004). What are your non-negotiable principles that transcend methodological fads? 5. Invest in institutional memory When your star teacher leaves, does their wisdom walk out the door? When leadership changes, does your campus start from scratch? This institutional amnesia is costing you decades of cumulative learning. Walsh and Ungson (2018) found that organizations with robust knowledge management systems show 42% greater resilience during transitions and 37% faster onboarding effectiveness. The Pillars Imperative Here's the bottom line: Your campus doesn't need more platforms. It needs pillars robust enough to support lasting transformation. Stop asking: "How can we showcase our success?" Start asking: "What are we building that will outlast us?" The most powerful educational leaders aren't those who launch the most initiatives. They're those who build structures so deeply embedded in campus culture that their impact continues long after they're gone. What will you stop building today so you can start building what lasts? REFERENCES: Bryk, A. S., & Schneider, B. (2002). Trust in schools: A core resource for improvement. Russell Sage Foundation. Collins, J. C., & Porras, J. I. (2004). Built to last: Successful habits of visionary companies. HarperBusiness. Gurin, P., Nagda, B. A., & Zúñiga, X. (2013). Dialogue across difference: Practice, theory, and research on intergroup dialogue. Russell Sage Foundation. Komives, S. R., Dugan, J. P., Owen, J. E., Wagner, W., & Slack, C. (2016). The handbook for student leadership development (2nd ed.). Jossey-Bass. Turkle, S. (2015). Reclaiming conversation: The power of talk in a digital age. Penguin Press. Walsh, J. P., & Ungson, G. R. (2018). Organizational memory. In The Palgrave encyclopedia of strategic management (pp. 1167-1170). Palgrave Macmillan.
Show More